5 phrases you shouldn't tell your kids

There are five common phrases most parents use and there are reasons why they should be avoided.

Try to be the kind parent that you have always wanted and that you would like your children to be.

It's natural to make mistakes, but don't repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

Relationship between parents and children

1. "You drive me crazy"

This may be true, but there are many truthful things that should not be told to children. When you claim that a child drives you crazy or makes you angry, it teaches him that he is responsible for the behavior of other people.

Children find a way to blame themselves for everything, and we do not need to help them in this. Instead, give an example of emotional regulation. For example, "It is very difficult for me to be patient now, I need time to calm down." And then do it, take a break.

2. "Because I said so."

Such a statement requires blind obedience to authority. It discourages the desire to solve a problem, think freely, and even the ability to understand the rules. We need to stimulate curiosity in children, not deprive them of it.

Show your child that he deserves an explanation for the behavior that is required of him. Encourage curiosity and critical thinking. They do not have to agree with your explanations, but they do have a right to know them if we expect them to adhere to the rules.

3. "Stop crying now!"

Never before has this phrase helped solve the problem. It only adds to the feeling of fear, panic and lack of control in a difficult situation.

Have you ever heard from adults: “I was very upset, but then my husband shouted to stop crying and I felt much better”?

Crying is not bad behavior. What's more, crying is one of the healthiest ways babies express negative emotions.

4. "This is life!"

We often use this phrase when we have nothing to offer. We know the situation is wrong or unfair, and we know that our child is hurt by it. We often realize that nothing can be done.

This phrase is an excuse, but it does not help the child cope with frustration. Moreover, she teaches him to accept the worst aspects of life, even if they are unacceptable to him.

If possible, try to find a way to deal with the problem. Teach your child that they have the strength to cope, rather than rewarding helplessness.

5. “You overreact. Don't be so sensitive. "

This tells the child that his feelings are not important. It also deprives him of the desire to empathize with others when they are upset. When we tell a child that it is wrong to be emotional, we teach him that emotions are a sign of weakness.

Thus, we devalue the manifestation of emotions and teach them to suppress them. It also tells the child that it is their fault for being upset.

Instead, it is better to teach your child to respect the emotions of others, to understand their own emotions, and to deal with them responsibly.